


Houston, I Have So Many Problems

by maddiebug



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Crack, F/M, Identity Reveal, Teleportation, The Moon - Freeform, Yes this one is aslo stupid but fun, its okay, ive been writing a lot of stupid things recently, marinette makes convoluted plans and we love her for it, no beta we die like men, the horse miraculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:01:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21853363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddiebug/pseuds/maddiebug
Summary: When the Akuma hit Ladybug, everything changed in an instant.One moment she was fighting in Paris, the next, she was lying down in a bed of rock and dust.Her yo-yo started beeping.Somehow, she had magical phone service, even in the desolate wasteland."Ladybug are you okay?""Yeah." She grunted, trying to stand up. "I'm fine.""Where are you?""I don't know. I still don't quite know what happened.""Ladybug, do you know where you are?""I don't- oh shit." Ladybug looked up to the sky."LB. Are you there?""Yeah. Yeah I'm definitely still here.""Then what's wrong?""Houston." She sighed. "I have so many problems."
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 54
Kudos: 369





	Houston, I Have So Many Problems

**Author's Note:**

> This would never happen in canon but like imagine if it did

Marinette was-

-Scratch that-

-Ladybug was getting very tired of fighting Satellite. 

It would've been an easy fight, if not for Satellite's ability to teleport. She would be right in front of Ladybug one minute and gone the next.

That seemed to be her only power, but Ladybug didn't want to get close enough to touch her, especially when she had a suspiciously gun-shaped object on her hip.

According to Chat, Satellite had been a model who's heart was broken over an astronaut. He was scheduled to leave tomorrow and told her today that they needed some time apart.

Needless to say, she didn't take the news very well.

Chat thought that the Akuma was in her hair-tie, but Ladybug and him could never get close enough to grab it. 

They were both exhausted. 

After three hours of fighting, they hadn't made any progress. Chat urged her to call on her lucky charm, but she had a sinking feeling that she needed to wait. 

Something wasn't right. 

In the moment when she was about to call her Lucky Charm, Ladybug got hit.

She barely turned in time to see the gun pointed at her head. It made a cartoonish sound, that she would've laugh at, if it hadn't been so shocking.

She heard Chat screaming her name, and then nothing. 

When the Akuma hit Ladybug, everything changed in an instant.  
One moment she was fighting in Paris, the next, she was lying down in a bed of rock and dust. 

She looked around, not recognizing anything. It was dark and dry. Everything was a sandy Gray color, empty and cold. It reminded her of the apocalypse she'd seen when Chat Blanc destroyed the world. Ladybug shivered. She didn't known if she could go through that again. She never wanted to feel so alone.

Her yo-yo started beeping. 

Somehow, she had magical phone service, even in the desolate wasteland.

"Ladybug are you okay?" Chat Noir's familiar face appeared on the screen if her yo-yo. It was a relief to know that she, at the very least least, had not time traveled.

"Yeah." She grunted, trying to stand up. "I'm fine."

"Where are you?"

She looked at her surroundings. "Honestly, still trying to figure that one out." It looked like no place she'd ever seen. "Maybe I'm in some weird desert?"

"Can you come back?"

"I don't know how. I still don't quite know what happened." She pushed herself into a standing position and almost fell over again. "I don't like this."

"Please hurry. Paris needs you. I need you." He paused. "Huh. That's weird."

"What's weird?"

"Usually I can find where you are on a map."

"What do you mean usually?" She took a step forwards and accidentally leaped. "Whoa! Chat this is weird."

"What?"

"I just. I jumped. And I didn't mean to."

"Yeah the miraculous makes us stronger." She watched through the screen as he did a backflip.

"No. It was more than that. It was weird."

"Ladybug, do you know where you are?" He yelped. "Oof just dodged an attack. Where are you?"

"I don't- oh shit." Ladybug looked up to the sky. 

"LB. Are you there?"

"Yeah. Yeah I'm definitely still here."

"Then what's wrong?"

"Houston." She sighed. "I have so many problems."

"What?"

"Why did it have to be the moon?"

"You're kidding."

"Chaton, I wish I was kidding."

"You're on the moon."

"Yep."

"What do I- Where did- How do I even get you back?"

"One step at a time kitty."

"Okay, step one, get you back."

"Yeah. How can we do that?" 

"I can't teleport."

"Neither can I..." she smiled. "But I think we both know someone who can."

"I feel like this is Karma for when I told you I loved you to the moon and back."

"It's not your fault kitty."

"This is the universe, telling me to stop."

"No. This is Ladybug, telling to to travel to the moon and come get me."

"Okay. Just give me a minute to figure this out and I'll call you back."

"K"

...

Needless to say, Ladybug was not amused when he called her back three hours later. 

"Why did it take so long? I haven't even told you where-"

"I'm sorry m'lady, but the soonest I can get a spaceship to the moon is three years. And it'll take a few months more to get back."

"Three years?" She looked around her. "I'd go insane. I can't hold the transformation that long."

"Paris will be completely destroyed by then. It's hopeless."

"Wait a minute." She chuckled. "Did you say a spaceship?"

"What should I do?"

"Not get a spaceship." She laughed.

"I see no other option."

"That's literally impossible. We're like 15, and not astronauts."

"I can make it happen."

"Chat," she laughed, "just use the horse miraculous."

"Oh... yeah that's faster. Where is it?"

"Go to Master F-" She frowned as the word's slipped. "Never mind."

"You're the Master now."

"I can't believe you forgot about the horse miraculous." She laughed. "But I don't know what to do."

"I-" He paused. "If you could tell me where they're hidden?"

"I don't-"

"I know it's risky. But I can keep a secret."

"Chat. I know you can."

"Why won't you trust me?"

"What? Kitty, you're the person I trust most. There's no one else I'd rather have as my partner."

As she said the words, she realized they were true. Chat and her were a perfect team, whether she wanted to admit it or not."

"Then please, trust me with this."

"Okay." She took a breath. "Just don't be mad when you find out who I am."

"I won't."

"And please ignore the posters in my room."

"What?"

"Just promise."

"Okay, ill ignore the posters in your room."

"Pinky swear."

"I don't think we have time for that." 

"Right. Oh yeah."

"So, where's the box?"

"You know the Dupain-Cheng patisserie?"

"Yeah." He sounded choked up. "I'm familiar with the location."

"They have a daughter."

"Marinette." He whispered.

"Yeah. If you go in her room. In her closet, there's a locked box. The code is 7252."

"Got it. Marinette closet, 7252."

"That's not all."

"It isnt?"

"No. When you open that box, there will be a key."

"A key?"

"Yeah. It opens the drawer on the side of her desk."

"Okay. Marinette, closet, 7252, key, desk, miraculous."

She winced. "There's one more thing."

"One more thing?"

"The desk drawer has the key to a box on her balcony. That box opens up to the miraculous box. You'll have to press buttons 1, 3, 2 and 7 on the miraculous box."

"Okay."

"Do you have it all?"

"Yeah. Marinette, closet, box, 7252, key, drawer, key, balcony, box, 1327, horse miraculous. Did I miss anything?"

"Nope, you've got it."

"Why is it so complicated?"

"I keep the other key to the balcony box on me at all times."

"Oh that makes sense. But when you're in trouble, Marinette can help."

"If I'm in trouble, Marinette is in trouble."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

He took a breath. "OH. Marinette?"

"Yeah. I really didn't want the reveal to go this way, but it was inevitable-"

"Yeah, got it. Horse miraculous. I'm on my way." He but his lip. "To the moon."

"Give it to Max Kante. Short kid, glasses, you met him on the train?"

"Yeah, I'm familiar."

"Okay, bug out."

"Hopefully ill see you soon."

"Wait a minute-"

"Yeah?"

"Were you seriously going to get a spaceship to the moon?"

"No comment?"

"What kind of connections do you have?"

"Once again, no comment."

"That's not possible."

"I know you don't want to find out my identity, but let me assure you, it is possible. Very expensive, but possible."

"Who are you?"

"Well, bugaboo," he chuckled, "that's between me and the 57 pictures of Adrien Agreste that are on your wall."

"Ohhhh. I stg kitty. You promised you would ignore them." She raised an eyebrow. "Wait. You counted them?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not a stalker."

"I didn't think-"

"I'm really sorry."

"Honestly, I'm flattered."

"What why would you be-"

"Uh oh." 

"Oh no. Flattered? Adrien?" 

"Max will come get you soon." He hung up on her.

She tried calling, but the phone wouldn't connect. 

"I can't believe Adrien Agreste was going to fly to the moon for me."

...

And three years later, he did.

Go to the moon that is. 

He had already saved Ladybug and they defeated Hawkmoth, but Adrien couldn't cancel his moon plans.

Marinette kept calling him to laugh during the months that he was on the ISS. To laugh at him for booking a trip when he was 15 to the moon. 

Who did that? Not regular people. 

But Adrien was a free man. His father was in jail, his girlfried was on earth and he was halfway to the moon.

He hadn't been the smartest as a teenager. He'd make plans impulsively and forget about them. Like this one. And he couldn't back out now.

But it gave him the perfect opportunity for when he got back to earth.

He fiddled with the ring in his pocket. Not the miraculous, but a different one.

As soon as he stepped foot back on earth, he was going to find Marinette Dupain-Cheng and propose to her.

He loved her to the moon and back, twice. 

<3

**Author's Note:**

> Bonus: Max shows up, brings LB back and they defeat the akuma in seconds.  
> Max/horseboi is the only one of the three heroes who isn't a complete disaster, but doesn't question it. He gives back his miraculous  
> Then LB and CN have a whole panic on the Eiffel tower where education about everything.  
> They go back to Mari's house and have dinner with her parents and start dating.  
> Everyone at school asks Mari how she revealed her crush and she just smiles and goes, "he actually asked me out."  
> Adrien would reply. "I love her to the moon and back."  
> She would groan in response which confused everyone  
> B/c no one even knew that lb went to the moon, they thought she just disappeared.  
> No one else was sent to the moon in that Akuma attack or any after.  
> ...  
> Bonus 2: I had to edit this immediately after posting because I accidentally typed "his father was in Jail, his girlfriend was in jail, and Adrien Agreste was halfway to the moon"  
> Which like Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Ladybug, and icon would never go to jail but imagine  
> ...  
> Thanks for reading!!! Please leave comments and kudos, I love you guys!
> 
> ....
> 
> Hey, do you read/write/art for this fandom? Check out the [ miraculous fanworks ](https://discord.gg/mlfanworks) discord server.


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